Lotus666
06-08-09, 10:04 PM
Lord Destroyer contributed this one back in June 2009 (this year - a recent one!)...
Based on the 1970's TV show of the same name, created by Sid and Marty Krofft, Land of the Lost starts out with Dr. Rick Marshall (Will Ferrell) being interviewed on the Today Show with Matt Lauer. The interview quickly sours and Marshall is led from the studio - but he rushes back and jumps Lauer when he apparently hears Lauer call his theories crazy and say he's basically a total nutcase.
Three years after that disastrous interview, Rick Marshall is employed at the La Brea Tar Pits park, and he has not let go of his theories in the slightest. He theorizes that minute particles called tachyons are the key to creating the time warps he spoke of in that interview. He meets a woman, Holly Cantrell (Anna Friel), who followed his theories with considerable zeal. She shows him a fossil - it looks like a lighter was pressed into rock, and he finds the lighter he carries with him fits the imprint perfectly. With some tinkering, he's able to complete his tachyon amplifier.
Holly takes Rick to where she found the fossil, some kind of tourist trap out in the middle of nowhere, called Devil's Cave or something like that. They meet the store's proprietor, Will Stanton (Danny McBride), and want to take the "tour" into Devil's Cave - they do what Will asks of them, and the tour begins. Rick activates his tachyon amplifier and things go haywire. An earthquake starts and the stream becomes major rapids - the tachyon amplifier is dropped overboard by accident, and the raft with the threesome go over a waterfall.
They come to...and they're in the middle of a desert with strange things strewn about - the first thing Rick says in reference to the interview that led to his downfall, "Matt Lauer can suck it". Their trudging leads them to three beings that look like a cross between monkeys and people. It appears one of them is about to either sacrifice or execute another, but the threesome intercede and scare away two of them. The one that was about to be sacrificed becomes a friend, named Cha-Ka (Jorma Taccone).
They start walking away when they suddenly fall down a sand pit and wind up in a cave with a lot of bones strewn all over the place. They're suddenly seized by vines and dangle up above the cave floor. They start swinging back and forth, trying to grab a tree when a hungry T-rex ruins the plan. They somehow get loose and run for it - they cross a crevasse much like the one in the TV show, and the Rex stops short. It appears he's giving up the chase, but the moment Rick says something about dinosaur brains being the size of walnuts, the Rex turns around, gets a running start, and leaps the crevasse. The pursuit reignites and they run to a cave high up in a mountain with a treacherous uphill grade. They make it, but it seems like they're stuck there to die. They dub the Rex that pursued them "Grumpy" (just like in the TV show, only a lot more persistent, it seems).
The next couple of days - they explore and find something looking like a civilization forgotten by time. Cha-Ka is freaking out the whole time, and soon a bunch of Sleestaks appear and it appears they're surrounded. Some light reflecting off Holly's belt buckle somehow opens a door in a nearly invisible pylon in the middle of a plaza and they're right near it with the Sleestak closing in. They get inside and meet a golden-skinned being, calling himself Enik. Rick is told by Enik that the tachyon amplifier is somewhere in this place and it's the key to getting home. However, he is unable to pinpoint it because it seems like it's moving the whole time. Apparently Enik needs Rick to get the amplifier before another Sleestak, called the Zarn, gets it and starts a plan to dominate the universe. Will doesn't trust Enik - claims the one with the tunic will double-cross you. The others are leery of that claim, but learn the hard way eventually.
They somehow find the desert area they landed in and find a lot more things strewn about - the Golden Gate Bridge, a drive-in theater, and an ocean liner to name a few. Things quickly turn ugly when an ice-cream truck lands nearby and some dinosaurs tear the poor sap inside the truck to shreds. Grumpy arrives and another big carnivore shows up - it appears they're gonna fight, but instead they double-team Rick and company. Rick loses his backpack (Grumpy gets a laser pointer jammed in his teeth), and the other dino (I presume it's supposed to be Big Alice, the other big carnivore from the TV show) manages to chase Rick to the others standing near a catapult. They load the weapon with a canister of refrigerant and let it fly - canister ingested, carnivore coated with ice, then belly swells up and :boom:. Right there in the frozen, bloody remains...the tachyon amplifier. Before Rick can retrieve it, it's swiped by a passing pterodactyl and it flies to a volcano in the distance.
Rick was all set to just curl up and die, but Will, Holly, and Cha-Ka would have none of it. Those three leave Rick where he sprawled out and make camp somewhere in the jungle. Rick eventually joins them with a banjo in tow and he sings a rather off-key rendition of the TV show's theme, but he gets increasingly drowsy because of a big honkin' mosquito sucking blood out of him. He passes out and squashes the mozzie.
The next morning, they set out for the volcano and make their way to the top - they find a pterodactyl nest (or rather, incubator) at the summit. Rick manages to squeeze past the eggs and retrieves the amplifier. It turns out the weird tunes the amplifier churned out kept the baby 'dactyls asleep. They hole up in what looks like a motel in the middle of nowhere - while Rick, Will, and Cha-Ka mess around, Holly fiddles with the amplifier and gets it working right. She finds another pylon, opens it, and finds out Enik lied to them about the Zarn's intentions. Shortly thereafter, she's captured by the Sleestak.
Next morning, Rick, Will and Cha-Ka track Holly to the pylon she found. Cha-Ka hangs back, while Will and Rick manage to get to the Sleestak pit where Holly is about to be sacrificed. They turn the tables and rescue Holly, only for them to learn the hard truth about Enik. Will pipes up with some kind of "I told you so" response, and the Sleestak and Enik leave with the amplifier, but Grumpy shows up and it becomes a one-on-one fight between Rick and Grumpy. He recalls the motivational poster at his workplace and uses part of a staff to vault up...only for him to go down Grumpy's gullet.
Will, Holly, and Cha-Ka go to the main Sleestak plaza and fight their way in. It looks hopeless for them until Grumpy shows up...AND RICK IS ALIVE AND WELL SOMEHOW! Grumpy scatters the Sleestak, then Rick slides off Grumpy's tail like Fred Flintstone in the opening of The Flintstones. The foursome accost Enik, but the crystals are disrupted, closing the time doorway back to Earth. Rick uses a crystal Holly wore around her neck to restore the crystals, and Will and Cha-Ka keep Enik under wraps so Rick and Holly can leave. Will is intent on staying behind for some other reasons.
It all closes with Rick being on the Today Show once again, and the interview with Matt Lauer goes nicely - Lauer seems to accept the title of Rick's newest book (title is Matt Lauer Can Suck It), but he loses it and jumps Rick, and they brawl in the studio.
Although it's a far cry from the original 1970's TV show of the same name, Land of the Lost does have some moments here and there, and there's a good amount of WTF thrown in for good measure - but I guess that's par for the course when Will Ferrell is involved. It's an okay movie if you're into science fiction that centers around dinosaurs, time travel, and other suchlike.
Overall rating - 7/10
Based on the 1970's TV show of the same name, created by Sid and Marty Krofft, Land of the Lost starts out with Dr. Rick Marshall (Will Ferrell) being interviewed on the Today Show with Matt Lauer. The interview quickly sours and Marshall is led from the studio - but he rushes back and jumps Lauer when he apparently hears Lauer call his theories crazy and say he's basically a total nutcase.
Three years after that disastrous interview, Rick Marshall is employed at the La Brea Tar Pits park, and he has not let go of his theories in the slightest. He theorizes that minute particles called tachyons are the key to creating the time warps he spoke of in that interview. He meets a woman, Holly Cantrell (Anna Friel), who followed his theories with considerable zeal. She shows him a fossil - it looks like a lighter was pressed into rock, and he finds the lighter he carries with him fits the imprint perfectly. With some tinkering, he's able to complete his tachyon amplifier.
Holly takes Rick to where she found the fossil, some kind of tourist trap out in the middle of nowhere, called Devil's Cave or something like that. They meet the store's proprietor, Will Stanton (Danny McBride), and want to take the "tour" into Devil's Cave - they do what Will asks of them, and the tour begins. Rick activates his tachyon amplifier and things go haywire. An earthquake starts and the stream becomes major rapids - the tachyon amplifier is dropped overboard by accident, and the raft with the threesome go over a waterfall.
They come to...and they're in the middle of a desert with strange things strewn about - the first thing Rick says in reference to the interview that led to his downfall, "Matt Lauer can suck it". Their trudging leads them to three beings that look like a cross between monkeys and people. It appears one of them is about to either sacrifice or execute another, but the threesome intercede and scare away two of them. The one that was about to be sacrificed becomes a friend, named Cha-Ka (Jorma Taccone).
They start walking away when they suddenly fall down a sand pit and wind up in a cave with a lot of bones strewn all over the place. They're suddenly seized by vines and dangle up above the cave floor. They start swinging back and forth, trying to grab a tree when a hungry T-rex ruins the plan. They somehow get loose and run for it - they cross a crevasse much like the one in the TV show, and the Rex stops short. It appears he's giving up the chase, but the moment Rick says something about dinosaur brains being the size of walnuts, the Rex turns around, gets a running start, and leaps the crevasse. The pursuit reignites and they run to a cave high up in a mountain with a treacherous uphill grade. They make it, but it seems like they're stuck there to die. They dub the Rex that pursued them "Grumpy" (just like in the TV show, only a lot more persistent, it seems).
The next couple of days - they explore and find something looking like a civilization forgotten by time. Cha-Ka is freaking out the whole time, and soon a bunch of Sleestaks appear and it appears they're surrounded. Some light reflecting off Holly's belt buckle somehow opens a door in a nearly invisible pylon in the middle of a plaza and they're right near it with the Sleestak closing in. They get inside and meet a golden-skinned being, calling himself Enik. Rick is told by Enik that the tachyon amplifier is somewhere in this place and it's the key to getting home. However, he is unable to pinpoint it because it seems like it's moving the whole time. Apparently Enik needs Rick to get the amplifier before another Sleestak, called the Zarn, gets it and starts a plan to dominate the universe. Will doesn't trust Enik - claims the one with the tunic will double-cross you. The others are leery of that claim, but learn the hard way eventually.
They somehow find the desert area they landed in and find a lot more things strewn about - the Golden Gate Bridge, a drive-in theater, and an ocean liner to name a few. Things quickly turn ugly when an ice-cream truck lands nearby and some dinosaurs tear the poor sap inside the truck to shreds. Grumpy arrives and another big carnivore shows up - it appears they're gonna fight, but instead they double-team Rick and company. Rick loses his backpack (Grumpy gets a laser pointer jammed in his teeth), and the other dino (I presume it's supposed to be Big Alice, the other big carnivore from the TV show) manages to chase Rick to the others standing near a catapult. They load the weapon with a canister of refrigerant and let it fly - canister ingested, carnivore coated with ice, then belly swells up and :boom:. Right there in the frozen, bloody remains...the tachyon amplifier. Before Rick can retrieve it, it's swiped by a passing pterodactyl and it flies to a volcano in the distance.
Rick was all set to just curl up and die, but Will, Holly, and Cha-Ka would have none of it. Those three leave Rick where he sprawled out and make camp somewhere in the jungle. Rick eventually joins them with a banjo in tow and he sings a rather off-key rendition of the TV show's theme, but he gets increasingly drowsy because of a big honkin' mosquito sucking blood out of him. He passes out and squashes the mozzie.
The next morning, they set out for the volcano and make their way to the top - they find a pterodactyl nest (or rather, incubator) at the summit. Rick manages to squeeze past the eggs and retrieves the amplifier. It turns out the weird tunes the amplifier churned out kept the baby 'dactyls asleep. They hole up in what looks like a motel in the middle of nowhere - while Rick, Will, and Cha-Ka mess around, Holly fiddles with the amplifier and gets it working right. She finds another pylon, opens it, and finds out Enik lied to them about the Zarn's intentions. Shortly thereafter, she's captured by the Sleestak.
Next morning, Rick, Will and Cha-Ka track Holly to the pylon she found. Cha-Ka hangs back, while Will and Rick manage to get to the Sleestak pit where Holly is about to be sacrificed. They turn the tables and rescue Holly, only for them to learn the hard truth about Enik. Will pipes up with some kind of "I told you so" response, and the Sleestak and Enik leave with the amplifier, but Grumpy shows up and it becomes a one-on-one fight between Rick and Grumpy. He recalls the motivational poster at his workplace and uses part of a staff to vault up...only for him to go down Grumpy's gullet.
Will, Holly, and Cha-Ka go to the main Sleestak plaza and fight their way in. It looks hopeless for them until Grumpy shows up...AND RICK IS ALIVE AND WELL SOMEHOW! Grumpy scatters the Sleestak, then Rick slides off Grumpy's tail like Fred Flintstone in the opening of The Flintstones. The foursome accost Enik, but the crystals are disrupted, closing the time doorway back to Earth. Rick uses a crystal Holly wore around her neck to restore the crystals, and Will and Cha-Ka keep Enik under wraps so Rick and Holly can leave. Will is intent on staying behind for some other reasons.
It all closes with Rick being on the Today Show once again, and the interview with Matt Lauer goes nicely - Lauer seems to accept the title of Rick's newest book (title is Matt Lauer Can Suck It), but he loses it and jumps Rick, and they brawl in the studio.
Although it's a far cry from the original 1970's TV show of the same name, Land of the Lost does have some moments here and there, and there's a good amount of WTF thrown in for good measure - but I guess that's par for the course when Will Ferrell is involved. It's an okay movie if you're into science fiction that centers around dinosaurs, time travel, and other suchlike.
Overall rating - 7/10